Monday, May 9, 2011

Take Your Time


Why would anyone be in a relationship with someone they don't like. It's funny to hear how some of the women I work with talk about their boyfriends/husbands. I often wonder what their man would say if he know how bad they were being talked about. I've been guilty of talking bad about my girl, but it's usually after a huge fight when I'm venting to someone in my small group of trusted friends. I'm not going to sit up there and bad mouth my fiance to a bunch of outsiders just because we're arguing or having issues. Besides if your partner is so bad what does that say about you? You're the one that chooses to be with that person. The problem is that we don't take the time out to get to know each other before we get serious anymore.

When you first start dating you're not meeting a real person, you're meeting their Avatar. A false representation of who they think you would be attracted to. You have to accept the fact that there will be multiple lies. I mean why should you have to tell a complete stranger your business? I think I speak for most guys when I say that. "As long as you're giving it up, we really don't give a damn what you're talking about anyway." (Str8 Face) The way I see it, you pretty much have to let every lie told in the first six months of a relationship slide.

#LiesMenTell
1. We're not together anymore. We just live together.
2. I don't have any kids.
3. I would've gone pro if it wasn't for my bad knees.(Or back or the coaches didn't like me or whatever)
4. I would never do you like that.

And of course the classic...
5. I'm single.

Don't worry ladies I haven't forgotten about you. women lie just as much as men. They just have different types of lies.

#LiesWomenTell
1. That's just my baby's daddy.
2. I'm not like other girls.
3. I don't want to settle down and have kids either.
4. Who my ex? Please, I am so over him.

And of course the classic..
5. This is my real hair.

The bottom line is that it takes years to really get to know someone. We jump in to these so called "committed" relationships so quickly that by the time we realize we don't like each other, we have too much invested in the relationship to leave. At the end of the day I think we all need to slow it down just a little bit. I guess what I'm trying to say is... We can still have sex on the first night, we just can't move in with each other for a year or so.

2 comments:

  1. The advice that I have been giving my son is to be friends with a girl first before they start dating because I learned the hard way through my first marriage that I really didn't truly know the guy until after we were married and I was pregnant...... 4 kids later and 15 years in a bad marriage, I finally decided enough was enough and moved on finally.....but often wonder how life would have been if I would have made other decisions.
    I am enjoying reading your blogs....they make me think :)

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  2. I agree Flutterby. The person that I am now is nothing like the person I was fifteen years ago. I think that we often try to get involved in committed relationships too early in life. I tell my son that men learn a lot about themselves by their interaction with women. And that he should date (not sleep with) several different girls so that he can experience different personalities before he decides what he's looking for.

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